The Ross Family, circa December 2007

A CHRISTMAS TALE

PART ONE: THE RECKONING

'Twas the week before Christmas
Em was loudly to shout:
"Rob, are you going to send
Any Christmas cards out?

"Of course!"
Said the doghouse dweller-to-be,
"Absolutely... Yes... Of course... I know... I will... Sure..."
... Then rising up from his knees...

Ideas were elusive
As needles in hay
So he collected some intel
At canadapost.ca

It happens that on a cold
Blustery winters day...
In hell's when these cards
Would in time find their way!

"Oh, crap!" said Rob
"Am I ever dense!"...
"These need to go out
In the past flippin' tense!"

So with a spring in his step
Nat King Cole on CD
He'll have to get crackin'
Conceptually:

He dreamt he was a bulldozer
Of iron and steel
But his muse, metaphorically,
Was alone in a field

PART TWO: TRAPPED IN THE CLOSET

So Robert set... Hang on...
Unmasked shall *I* be!
I'm tired of typing
In the third person as me

So back to the story:
I thought "E-mail everyone
A photo of our baby
And POOF, I'll be done!"

But more complex, this idea
Was soon to be wrought
A family portrait - in a chair
By the fireplace! Why not?!

In Yule Tide garb
We just happened to be
As part of the season's
Festivities

So down to the living room
Camera in hand
To capture our family
On film we began

But pose after pose
And shot after shot
Said Em without fail:
"I like nothing we've got"

(Back to the living room
With positions assumed
To capture our family
On film we resumed)

PART THREE: COME ON, JANUARY

When concluded, it happened
With at long last, relief
One photo passed muster
From Commandante In Chief!

So back to the Bat Cave
Lights dimmed near black
I worked 'round the clock
On my uber-cool Mac

But to any great photo
Must a caption append
Delivered with love
To our family and friends:

With Baby On Board
Henceforth three we'll remain
The magic of the season
Is new once again

Stay tuned to your Inbox
'Round twelve months from here
But ne'er again with this photo:
She'll be bigger next year